


That One Mark Twain Quote About Cats

by Kaiel



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Animal Transformation, Catboy Jon, Crack Taken Seriously, Fluff, Gender Non-Conforming Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Jon was born a cat au, Leitner Books (The Magnus Archives), Mostly fluff though, mild body horror, past hurt present comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-23 05:21:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30050514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiel/pseuds/Kaiel
Summary: In which Jon was born a cat and had an unfortunate run in with a Leitner, so now he’s human, and rather unhappy about it.Jon just wants to be a cat again. Being human sucks.
Comments: 23
Kudos: 138





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have no justification here. I just wanted to write Cat Jon. 
> 
> Second chapter is in the works- your comments are my sole inspiration. 
> 
> Content Warnings at the bottom

“If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat”

 **-** Mark Twain

Jon’s hands shook as he looked at it. He could hardly believe it. After nearly twenty years of searching, it had just been tucked away in a dusty old basement in a box of discredited statements. It hardly seemed real. He chewed at his lip, trying to decide if it was best to read it here, or to try and sneak it out of the institute and read it back at his flat. 

He remembered that the effects were not instantaneous, and it likely wouldn’t begin to really take affect for several hours- best not to wait then. Jon didn’t want to wait anyway. It had been too many years- and the solution was just- sitting there in his hands. 

Reverently, he opened the book, not bothering to suppress the sneer at the nameplate he found inside it. From the Library of Jurgen Leitner. So clean and professional. As if it hadn’t ruined countless lives and robbed Jon of his very sense of self.

He didn’t linger on that first page, he quickly flipped to the diagrams. The first time, when he had been forced to gaze upon the cursed books pages, he hadn’t been aware that there was anything written there at all, so it was with some surprise that he noticed there was actually a fairly dense bit of text beneath every image. Jon had initially planned to flip quickly through every page, just as he had the first time, so that he might get the reverse effects. But he found himself unable to stop reading. 

That was fine. It was fine. He  wanted  these effects. It wasn’t like Mr. Spider. Though he couldn’t stop the sense of anxiety and dread that came over him as he read. Specifically as he read the section that detailed the life span of members of the genus Feline. 

He told himself it didn’t matter. 

Even if it was only able to truly be himself again for five minutes- it would be worth it. And it wasn’t like there was anyone who might miss him anyway. 

Then there was tea soaking through the delicate pages, Jon watched in horror as the ancient ink became muddled and indiscernible. The whole mess leaking down into his lap. 

“No.” He breathed, barely able to make his lips shape out the word. “No!” With more strength this time. He looked up, to see Tim, Sasha and Martin watching him with varying degrees of anxiety and worry. “What have you done?!” Jon cried, the agony in his voice colouring their faces with shock. “What have you done!?” He shouted this time and Martin took a step back- in fear or surprise- Jon didn’t know nor care. 

Jon had never yelled at his assistants. He had been cross with them of course, and he made no attempt to soften his words when he felt they had erred, but he had never, not once, raised his voice. So to hear him now, his voice cracking with the strain of his anguished shouts- it was clear that something was very very wrong. 

“Jon it was a goddamn Leitner- we couldn’t, we tried to get you to stop reading but you were just- gone!” Tim’s volume had matched Jon’s, not out of anger but out of a need to be heard above the noise of Jon’s cries. 

“You don’t understand!” Jon wailed. “I  need  to go back!! I need my body back! I can’t- I was so close!” His anger finally faded to sorrow, and he was unable to stop the sobs that wracked his thin frame. 

“Hey, hey- it’s um- it’s ok.” Tim said floundering fit what to do in this situation. “We can- um, dry it off right?” He gently took the book out of Jon’s hands and passed it to Sasha, who left to deposit it in under the air conditioner in the break room. She fully intended to burn it once it was dry, but it wouldn’t do for Jon to know that- especially after his reaction to dosing it with tea. 

“Can you tell us why it’s so important?” Tim tried. Martin had stripped off his cardigan and Tim wrapped it around Jon’s trembling shoulders. Jon said nothing. Staring listlessly down at his hands where the book had been taken. “Jon? Buddy?”

“I- twenty years. I’ve been trying to reverse the effect of that damned book for more than twenty years.” He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “I-I suppose I may as well make it a statement.” 

“If, if that’s what your most comfortable with Jon.” Sasha cut in. Jon gave her a long look, and shook his head. 

“I don’t know- it just, seems the easiest way to tell it. I-“ he looked down to see a tape recorder already running. “Statement of Jonathan Sims regarding his first encounter with a Leitner. 

I- I suppose I should start at the beginning. I was born in a back alley to a grey tabby cat. I was unusual in that I was a single kitten litter. I suspect the fact that my mother was underweight may have played a role in that. I don’t know what happened to my mother, but one day she didn’t come back. I was lucky though, I was found by Doris Sims. She was an older lady, but she had a fondness for cats and she took me in. 

I suppose she must have had experience with hand rearing kittens. She ended up keeping me, and for the first seven years of my life I was happy. It’s funny to hear people say sometimes that they wish they were a cat, that cats have the best lives- because I can tell you with absolute certainty that it is true. Doris wasa kind woman, and she had endless patience for the antics of a small kitten. She was the one who named me Jon.” He said, unable to help the fond smile that came with the memory. “She always said that a thing deserving of a name should have a dignified one. And her uncle had been the most dignified person she knew. So she named me after him.

But one day when I was about seven, she didn’t wake up. I tried everything I could think of, I kneaded at her stomach, I screamed, I batted at her face, but she didn’t wake up. 

The less said about the animal shelter I was eventually brought to the better.” Jon said with a shudder. He still had the odd nightmare about that place, he had been grieving everything he had ever known, and then he was surrounded by other cats and it was loud, and scary, and he had been trapped and- he swallowed hard took a breath and kept going. 

“I was eventually adopted by the assistant of one Jurgen Leitner. They had discovered a book that turned the reader into an animal, with complete awareness of what was happening to them. The victim would feel the transformation wholly and completely, and a part of them would remain aware as they lost themselves to animal instinct, unable to act or call out for help. They wished to see what would happen should an animal be exposed to it.

They held my head and forced me to watch as they turned the pages. It took days for the transformation to finish. They watched as my fur fell out in clumps and my limbs twisted and distorted. They, they did nothing as screamed. I- I don’t know if you’ve ever heard a cat scream. Really scream that is. It’s ah, surprisingly close to the screams of a little boy actually.” He risked a glance up at the others. He wasn’t sure what he would do if they didn’t believe him. Would they try to send him away? Or would they mock him? Would it be worse if they did believe him and he himself ended up in artifact storage? Not everyone was against animal testing after all, and Jon had seen they way Elias’s leather shoes gleamed in the fluorescent lights of the upper floors. He quickly gave up trying to read the faces of his assistants and pressed forward. 

“I tried to get it back, but- but I couldn’t even balance without my tail, and I was barely able to stand let alone climb the enormous shelf the book was kept on. I- I suppose looking back I was lucky that Mr. Leitner wasn’t the sort of rich old man who might have had a use for a little boy with no legal records. 

As it was they felt that I would be of more use as a fellow assistant. At first, I was useful, as I could handle the books with minimal affect, as I couldn’t read them. But with my limited ability to walk they decided to teach me to read instead. I wasn’t able to speak, I wasn’t taught that until much later. It, um it’s the only thing I have left of who I was before. My voice. I can still purr and communicate as I did before. I didn’t  want to learn to speak English. I didn’t want to have one more thing taken from me. But I was bored enough that I did learn how to read. I- I don’t remember how many of the books I read, not a great deal until I was given Mr. Spider. It- um, it’s a children’s book- the reader is fed to an enormous spider creature in the end. However it had the advantage of causing the reader to walk to where Mr. Spiders door has appeared. The assistants wanted to see what would happen so they allowed me outside for the first time since I was taken. 

In the end one of them I- I suppose felt guilty. He slapped the book out of my hands before I was eaten. I don’t know if he wanted me out of harms way, or he just didn’t want to loose a valuable test subject, but he got eaten instead. 

I was able to get away at this point where I was found by a police officer and placed into the foster system. By the time I learned how to speak, I knew enough not to tell anyone what had happened to me. But the one time I managed to get away from my caregivers some years later- it was too late. The library was gone, and Jurgen Leitner was presumably dead. 

I’ve been looking for the book ever since. I just-“ Jon’s voice broke with the suppressed sob. “I just want to be  me  again. Being like this- it  hurts  it feels fundamentally  wrong and I just want to be me.” He squeezed his eyes shut. 

“Fuck Jon that’s awful.” Martin said, and Jon looked up in surprise. Martin’s swearing caught him off guard, but he could see the other two nodding in agreement. 

“God I’m so sorry Jon.” Sasha said. “When Martin said you wouldn’t stop reading I just- I worked in artifact storage for long enough to- I’m sorry.” She looked miserable. Jon sighed. 

“It’s- you couldn’t have known I just-“

“Wait.” Tim cut in. “Wait if you turned into a seven year old child- if you turned back into a cat now- Jon cats don’t live to be 40!”

“I’m only 30.” Jon said irritably. “Ive been grey since I was a kitten, and I’ll have you know the world record for a cat is 38.”

“Still!” Tim said. “And besides! What was your plan here? Read the book go home and get stuck in your flat without opposable thumbs?” Jon mumbled something under his breath. “What was that?” Tim asked. 

“I said- that I had been planning on leaving my flat door partly open first.”

“Jon.” Tim said dragging a hand across his face. “That’s not a good plan. You get why that’s a bad plan right? Please tell me you get that that was a bad plan. And what about us? We’re your friends! Were you even going to tell us? Or were you just going to disappear under mysterious circumstances?” 

“Ah. I-“

“You know what, don’t answer that.” Tim said, Jon could tell he was angry but for the life of him couldn’t figure out why. “Ok, ok so here’s what we’re gonna do. Archives sleepover at my place. Right now.” He held up a finger to Jon to silence any protests. “No Jon you do not get a say. It’s Friday, and we are all leaving early. Besides, do you really want to spend the rest of the day in tea soaked trousers?” Jon pursed his lips but conceded that Tim had a point there. “Besides, you  did  read some of that book- there’s no telling what that might still do to you.” Jon brightened a little at that. Maybe had actually read enough, maybe it wouldn’t matter that the book was ruined. 

“Alright. I, fine.” 

“Nice.” Tim cheered. “I’ll go clean out my car- it’s gross right now and I don’t want to drive you all around in it- and then we are out of here.” Tim left and Sasha offered Jon an awkward smile. 

“I can buy wine on the way there?” She offered and Jon nodded. 

“Yes, I think that would be an excellent idea.”

***

There were a great deal of things that Jon didn’t like about being a human, but after several glasses of wine and a few of what Tim had deemed “thematically appropriate movies” (read: brother bear, shrek 2 and the emperors new groove.) he found that perhaps this wasn’t one of them. Jon had always really struggled to make friends. He just- fundamentally didn’t understand people. They had all these unspoken rituals that he seemed to have to learn manually, it was exhausting. Cats, cats he understood. The body language was clear and the vocal communications simple. Still, on a night like tonight curled up in a pile of warm bodies half passed out after the end of the last movie, he could almost convince himself that it might be ok to be human. 

When Jon awoke the next morning, sometime around 5, as always, he couldn’t stop the sigh of disappointment when he realized without even opening his eyes, that he was not a cat. 

He wasn’t surprised really, the first time he had read the damn book it had been agonizing. He couldn’t imagine that loosing the mass he had gained to once more become a housecat would be a  pleasant  process. Still, it hurt that he had been so close. Jon extricated himself form the pile of limbs he was trapped under and made his way to the bathroom, eyes still sleep blurred. Halfway there however he noticed he hadn’t tripped once. He could see perfectly fine- despite the complete darkness provided by Tim’s blackout curtains. Jon froze, mind racing as he tried to figure out what this meant. He moved quickly to the bathroom, flipping on the light out of habit, and making a face at the sudden shift in brightness. When he looked in the mirror he gasped. The eyes looking back at him were  his.  It was the first time he had seen his own eyes- his  real  eyes in two decades. He couldn’t stop the tears that formed in the corners. 

But his eyes weren’t the only change, his ears too, they had moved up his head slightly- though they were still more on the sides than not. But they too- were  his.  He flicked the right ear and with shaking hands reached out to touch his own soft fur. Freezing in surprise when he looked at his hands. 

They weren’t proper claws, not like he had had before- but they were still scores better than his feeble human nails had been. The smile that came to his face unbidden revealed yet another change, less dramatic, but still; sharper teeth and- he was pretty sure a slightly thinner tongue too. 

He realized then that he could feel something fuzzy tucked into his left pant leg. Jon had experienced phantom limb syndrome ever since the transformation. He knew intellectually of course that his tail was gone. But he swore he could still  feel  it sometimes, so when he finally lay eyes on the fluffy monstrosity that had been missing from his life for so many years he dropped to his knees. He flicked his tail reverently into his hands, and stroked it openly crying. It wasn’t perfect, but it was still so much better than it had been. He felt like, for the moment at least he had managed to gain the best of both worlds. The opposable thumbs, with the claws as it were. 

“Jon? Is everything alright? I thought I heard-“ Martin cut himself off as he came round the corner and saw Jon still kneeling on the floor. “Jon?” He sounded much more awake now. “Jon are- are you ok?”

“I- Yes.” Jon said his tone slightly manic from the relief that coloured it. He could stop the slightly hysterical laugh that came with it. “Yes Martin- I, I’m doing great.” He let out a slightly hysterical giggle. “How are you?” 

“Jon what- oh, Oh! Are those-“ Martin reached out as if to touch Jon’s ears, but pulled back when Jon immediately hunched his shoulders, leaning back. “Sorry- sorry I just- those are-“

“Yes.” Jon said relaxing again and getting to his feet. “It, ah it seems the book had some effect at least. It’s not ideal of course, but still better than nothing I suppose.”

“Martin? Jon? What’s going on why are you both up so-“ Tim’s voice cut off when he came round the corner and caught sight of Jon. “Cat boss!” He said gleefully reaching out towards Jon’s head- only to pull back at Jon’s flattened ears and half bitten off hiss. “Right right- consent. May I give you scratches cat boss?” Jon thought about it, and shook his head. 

“Later, I’m- they are still sensitive. New- new nerve endings and all.” 

“Yeah- that makes sense.” Tim looked over to where Sasha was stumbling out of bed as she woke up to all the commotion. “Tell you what I’m gonna go get started on breakfast ok? Since we’re all up anyway.” 

Jon turned back to the mirror, ignoring Martin, and unable to suppress the gentle purr that resonated in his chest as he gently touched one of his ears, smiling in unabashed delight. 

“I’ll uh, I’ll go make some tea.” Martin said, shuffling awkwardly from foot to foot. Jon acknowledged that with a flick of his ear. Delighting in the fact that his actual body language could once more be read. 

Breakfast itself presented to Jon a problem that he had no initially considered. There was no easy way to sit at Tim’s table without also sitting on his tail. Normally this would not have posed much of an issue- but he hadn’t been lying, now that he knew they were there, his ears and tail were painfully sensitive. Still it was a problem solved easily enough by turning the chair backwards and straddling it. 

He reached for his tea cup- looking forward to that first sip- only to let out a surprised yelp when Sasha slapped his hand. 

“Sorry! Sorry- it’s just- do we know if you can safely  have  tea now?” Jon blinked in surprise. 

“I don’t- I’m still mostly human. I think.” He said, but Tim backed her up. 

“We don’t know though Jon- I mean, look at your teeth! We have no idea what sort of internal changes may heave taken place. You might be a carnivore again!” He looked disapprovingly at Jon’s toast. 

“I don’t-“

“Oh god I almost killed my boss.” Martin whispered, Jon was pretty sure he wouldn’t have heard it were it not for his newly enhanced hearing. 

“I doubt it would have killed me.” Jon said, trying to comfort the other man, and Martin flushed red. 

“Maybe not.” Sasha conceded. “But we should try and test it. I’m sure the last thing you want to do is get sick. I don’t even know where we would take you now. The vet?” Jon flinched at the idea, his ears going flat against his head. Tim laughed. 

“Oh my god, those things are like mood rings!” Tim said in delight. Jon flicked an ear back. 

“Yes.” He said in a tone that heavily implied as ‘your point?’ 

“Huh. I guess that’s why your always so hard to read eh?”

“I- suppose?” Jon agreed hesitantly. 

“No no it totally makes sense.” Tim continued. Tim then looked directly at Jon and very deliberately blinked at him, in an exaggerated slow manner. The noise Jon made in response was distinctly inhuman. And wasn’t that close to feline either. Tim laughed at how flustered Jon looked. “Ha! I can totally flirt in cat!” He said triumphantly. 

“That’s not- I was, no I-“ Jon shook his head. He was too flustered to say anything. Tim laughed an offered Jon an easy smile. 

“Ok Sash- how do we test Jon’s new dietary requirements? Without, you know actually killing him. I mean- I know you want his job but-“

“Tim!” Sasha cried trying to shush him. 

“No its, it’s alright.” Jon said. “I know it should have been you. I actually recommended you when Elias offered me the position, but he was quiet pushy and, well I-“ Jon looked down, eye contact suddenly feeling a bit too much. “I thought I might have a greater chance at coming into contact with the book as the Archivist.” The table was quiet for a moment. Sasha was now deeply regretting some of the angry rants she had shared with Tim about Jon taking the job she had felt should have been hers. Also feeling even worse now for ruining the Leitner. She had checked it that morning before everyone settled in for breakfast. It was unsalvageable. She hadn’t actually looked at the pages of course, she had no desire to become a cat herself. Despite Jon’s rousing endorsement of the species. But she had flipped open a few pages and taken pictures of them blindly with her phone. The pictures were perfectly clear. They shouldn’t have been clear if the book still had any sort of power to it. They should have been blurred and distorted. But the pictures showed only runny ink blots.

So Jon was stuck half way for the foreseeable future. 

“Elias is kind of a dick isn’t he?” She said to break the silence. Jon laughed surprising everyone.

“Yes, yes he really is- do you know, on my first interview for the research position he asked me ‘What was I most afraid of?’ And if my history of antisocial behaviour in the foster system would be a ‘detriment to my employment’” Jon said in an uncanny impression of Elias. “What kind of interviewer  does  that? Honestly it should have been a red flag that he looked that deeply into my records.” He added with a sigh. 

“Oh my god right?” Sasha agreed. 

“He asked me if my father leaving my mum and me would affect my work ethic.” Martin added quietly.

“My god what a creep!” Tim joined in. “Gotta say Jon- I didn’t think I’d see the day where you were the one leading the charge in the anti-Elias sentiment.”

“Yeah- we pegged you for one of those- ‘respect authority’ types.” Sasha added. Jon nearly choked on his bite of toast at that. 

“Ah no.” He said coughing. “I would not say I fit that particular type.” He thought back to his time in the punk scene with Georgie. “Respecting authority as it were is a means to an end. You all  should  respect my authority, because I approve your vacation requests. But Respecting the authority and respecting the person are very different things. I respect Elias because he signs my paycheques. So no disrespect at work. But we are not  at  work and he’s a creep that activates my fight or flight response just by opening his mouth.” Martin snorted at that. 

“I swear that man looks at you and knows all your secrets- but rather then tell you that outright he uses it to taunt you.” Martin said. 

“God that’s so true!” Sasha agreed. “Right so- I think we’re all in agreement here that we don’t fill out form 28b?”

“What?” Tim asked. 

“The Lietner incident report form.” Jon said. “And while I would understand if any of you chose to do so- I, I would prefer this not be reported. I’d rather not have people try and-“ he swallowed hard. “Reverse the few things I managed to get back.” A look of guilt crossed Sasha’s face, but she didn’t say anything. 

“Of course we won’t report you Jon!” Martin said- giving Tim a sharp look. 

“As if  I  would report anything.” Tim said rolling his eyes. Jon slumped down with relief. 

“R-right. That’s, that’s good.”

“It does pose a different problem though.” Martin said slowly. 

“Oh?” Jon asked looking over at him. 

“How are we going to hide the changes?” 

“Oh.” Jon looked down at his tail steadily flicking back and forth and then the claws that adorned his fingers. “That- that might be a problem.”

“We could get you a hat?” Tim offered. Jon’s ears pressed flat against his head at the thought. He  hated  hats indoors. “I mean it’s that or we convince the office that you’re a really dedicated furry who bought some of those brain controlled cat ears.” 

Jon didn’t bother to smother the death glare he sent Tim’s way at that particular suggestion. 

“He’s got a point Jon.” Sasha said. “For the tail I suppose you could wear one of your longer skirts? I can’t imagine it will be all that comfortable to stuff that fluffy monstrosity into a pair of pants- where you a Persian or something?”

“No!” Jon said deeply offended. “I most certainly am not! I am a long haired cat though.” He conceded. “And despite my current form, it’s not past tense. I never stopped being a cat. I-I’m human, sure. But I’m still a cat.” 

“Ok ok-“ Tim broke in. “But how do we hide those claws?” 

“We don’t.” Jon said primly. “I will paint them. In uni I used to get stiletto manicures all the time. Human gender is baffling and I refuse to allow it to prevent me from having nice things.” Jon didn’t entirely understand the surprised laughter that produced but it was nice regardless. 

***

It turned out testing Jon potential tea intolerance was easier that he would have thought. Sasha ran down to the grocery store to buy a tin of activated charcoal for him in case he started to show signs of a bad reaction. 

It turned out they needn’t have bothered, the second the tea hit Jon’s tongue something in his mind screamed ‘poison’ and he spat it back out. Which was rather unfortunate, but Martin promised to invest in a few cat safe herbal teas for the office. Jon in turn told Martin to keep the receipts and he would expense the purchases back to the institute. Rank hath its privilege and all. 

The next thing on the agenda then was shopping. Jon only had two skirts, and both were closer to knee length, while his tail hung down nearly past his ankles. So that morning found the four of them pilling into Tim car once again to hit up the charity shop. Jon had agreed to wear the beanie provided to him by Tim- on the condition that he would definitely be getting a better hat at the charity shop. 

While there however Jon came across a number of scarves, and bandanas that if folded carefully, would cover his ears  and  keep his hair out of his face, all while having the advantage of not being a hat. Plus he could still pull his hair into a bun that way- something that was difficult to do with a proper hat. Jon gratefully changed into the new skirt the second he could, Sasha had been right, wearing pants with his fluffy tail was Not a good idea.

But over all he found he had quite enjoyed himself, and when Tim finally dropped him off at home it felt entirely too empty. Normally if he was bored like this, he would just go into work, but the reason he would spent his saturdays and sundays at the institute had been to try and find the Book. Now that he had found it, he had little interest in slaving away without any overtime pay in a building that made him feel- watched. He paced his flat a while, relishing in the feeling of his tail flicking back and forth, enjoying the fact that for once he actually felt balanced. 

It had, he supposed been a while since he had talked to Georgie- he pulled out his phone and began typing.

Artwork by [the-arlunwyr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/the-arlunwyr)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this is going to be longer then I though 🤦 but hopefully it will only end up being one or two more chapters, cuz I reeeeally should be working on my siren Jon au. 
> 
> Either way thank you all for your comments and enjoy!

Jon stood in front of Georgie’s door Sunday evening, with a box of wine in one hand, the other hand being used to obsessively adjust his sunglasses and bandana. This was a bad idea. He  knew  this was a bad idea- she could always see right through him. She would  know.  He just knew it. He couldn’t even  drink  the damn wine! 

“Hey Jon! It’s good to see you- come in!” 

“Ah- um h-hello Georgie.” He said trying to smile and meet her eyes and failing miserably. 

“Ohh- is that box wine? You gentlemen you- here I’ll trade you.” She said, taking the wine and depositing in his arms a large fluffy cat. Jon purred quietly, as Georgie walked into the kitchen, revelling in the way the Admiral purred right back. He allowed the Admiral to scent mark him, and he very subtly tried to do the same. 

He must have mistimed it though, as Georgie walked around the corner and laughed. 

“Sometimes I swear you are part cat yourself with the way you interact with him. Jon gave an awkward laugh that was more of a cough then not. Georgie shook her head fondly. “Alright, come on, sit, I want to hear all about this new job you aren’t qualified for. Nice skirt by the way is it new?” 

“Ah- y-yes.” He stammered, hoping she didn’t notice the way it moved from his tail flicking anxiously back and forth. 

“Well it’s cute, green is a good colour on you.” 

Jon made his way carefully to the couch, the last thing he needed was to trip and have his skirt flip up. He had never told Georgie what he was and by this point it was probably too late for that. He had thought about it, once. Back when they were dating she came very close to being the first person Jon ever told. But years of biting his tongue were hard to break, and in the end he stayed quiet. Sometimes he wondered if that was why they hadn’t worked out. He had read once that human relationships required honesty. Though he had certainly seen plenty of relationships that didn’t seem to follow this standard. He shook his head to clear it- then carefully tugged his scarf back into place when he felt one of his ears threatened to pop back up. 

It wasn’t exactly comfortable to squish them down like this- and his hearing definitely suffered for it- which was why he didn’t hear Georgie behind him until he felt her hand on his shoulder. This was a problem for two reasons. The first being that in the short amount of time that Jon had regained some of his feline aspects he had realized that feline instincts was amount the traits he had regained. Now they had never fully left him, in that the memory of them was deeply ingrained, but things like startle responses, and reflexes had become decidedly more human after the first Leitner exposure. 

The problem with this of course was that as a cat, Jon’s startle response had tended towards leaping away from the thing that startled him. Generally by flinging himself a truly shocking height into the air for one so small. So when Georgie put a hand on his shoulder, Jon whipped around, flung the admiral in her direction, and flung himself several feet away. He  may  have been able to play this off, had a good laugh with Georgie and pretend it never happened, except in the process of flinging himself away, his tail shot out to help him balance, resulting in the bottom of his skirt getting caught and tangled around his ankles, leaving him in a knotted mess on the floor- with enough of the skirt having ridden up to reveal his tail. 

“Shit Jon are you alright? I didn’t mean to startle you like that.” Georgie began, coming over to help him up. “I- uh, didn’t realize you were a furry Jon.” She said very slowly upon spotting the tail. Jon sputtered. As a cat he had complicated feelings about furries. But they culminated in the fact that he very adamantly was not one. Something that Georgie well knew from their time together. He couldn’t stop his tail from flicking. She didn’t say anything more, and Jon certainly wasn’t going to say anything, so they just stared at each other, until Georgie finally sighed, rolled her eyes, and held out a hand to pull Jon up. 

“I, uh, suppose you want an explanation then?” Jon said sheepishly, taking her hand- mindful of his claws; and hauling himself to his feet. He pulled the scarf covering his ears off- there wasn’t much point in wearing it, if she had already seen the tail. Georgie reached up to touch one of her own ears in response. 

“No- not at all I definitely don’t need to know what’s going on.” She said rolling her eyes. “Yeah Jon. I’d like a damn explanation.”

“R-right. Uh, right.” He sat down on the couch, Georgie crossed her arms expectantly and leaned against her arm chair. Eyes never leaving Jon. He finally met her eyes, and noted as they widened in surprise at his now slit pupils. “So, um, I’m a cat.” He began. When he didn’t immediately continue Georgie rolled her eyes and sat down. 

“Go on.” She said, so Jon stumbled his way through the story for the second time in nearly as many days. Georgie looked at a loss for words when he finished. 

“Do-do you believe me?” Jon finally asked, looking up at her, uncertainty colouring his voice. 

“I- well it’s hard not to.” Georgie said and sighed. “Oh Jon. You poor thing. I always knew there was something that bothered you back when we were dating, I always felt like you were never quite comfortable in your own skin.” She laughed. “For the longest time I thought you were just trans and not ready to come out. Especially given the way you disregarded stereotypically gendered clothing.” She gave him a fond smile tinted with sadness. “Nothing can ever be straightforward for you can it Jon?” 

“I-I mean it’s was simple when I was a cat.” He argued. She laughed. 

“Yeah alright, actually- hang on a second, if you were-“ she caught his slight wince at the past tense and corrected herself, she had always been good at that. “Are a cat, can you  actually talk to the Admiral?”

“The short answer is yes- but it’s, more complicated then that. Cats mostly communicate through body language- and vocalization is mostly only used by kittens, or as a way of communicating with humans. I have for many years lacked the basic body parts required for some of that communication, so while I can understand the Admiral, I’m stuck essentially using baby talk to communicate back.”

“Wait- wait wait, are you telling me your ‘cat impression’ in uni was just, actual cat sounds? I knew it was too good!” Jon scratched at one of his ears. 

“Ah- yes that- yes.” He shrugged helplessly at her. 

“So what are you going to do now then?” She asked after a moment. 

“What do you mean?”

“Well if your whole life has been spent looking for a way to become a cat again, and now you’re achieved that as much as you can, where are you going to go from here?” Jon blinked at her. 

“I- I don’t know. I always, well I always assumed that if I found the book I’d be myself again, and I could just- find a human to take care of me. I never, well I never planned on getting stuck.” Georgie nods in understanding. 

“Right ok, did you have a human in mind for this plan?” Jon flushed, and looked away. He hadn’t initially had anyone in mind, but as soon as Georgie asked that an image of Martin had popped into his mind unbidden, and Jon was feeling- something about that. He didn’t know what- but it sure was an emotion. 

“Ah no I- I had been planning to be an outdoor cat?” He tried, Georgie tried not to laugh. 

“So are you going to keep looking for ways to complete the transformation?” She asked. 

“I-“ Jon chewed on his lip as he considered this, mindful of the sharper teeth. On the one hand- he was still stuck as a human, forced to work to survive and still struggling with a lot of basic human life skills. On the other hand, for the first time in years he actually felt- comfortable in his own skin. And the ability to read and the use of his thumbs really were nice perks. He had been trying so long to get back what he had lost though, that he didn’t know how to process the idea that he might be ok as is. “I don’t know.” He finally said helplessly. “I-I don’t think there is another way to turn me back, not without some serious consequences. Everything I’ve encountered in my research has led me to believe that they only reliable way to turn me back without all kinds of other consequences was the book. But it’s gone now. I don’t even-“ he shook his head he had no idea how to process these feelings. 

“Ok, well first question then- do you  want  to keep looking for a way to turn back?” She asked. 

“I-“ thoughts of the night before with his assistants popped into his head. “Maybe- maybe not right away?” He offered. 

“Ok, next question. Do you actually want to be working as an archivist? It is there other work you might enjoy more? Cuz if your going to stay human-ish, it might be a good idea to do something you actually enjoy instead of just a job you work to break your curse or whatever.”

“I- you- your right.” He said in surprise. “I don’t actually like my job. I- I’m stressed all the time, and I don’t know what I’m doing. But- but I- well with my physical differences I don’t even know if I can  get  a different job.” 

Georgie resisted the urge to tell Jon there were plenty of people who would find his extra fluffy bits deeply enticing, and that he could make a killing selling photos, he wouldn’t appreciate that. 

“You could record audiobooks?” She offered. “You definitely have the voice for it, plus then you wouldn’t have to work in a place with other people. You could do it from your flat.” Jon nodded in consideration. What he meant to say in response was ‘your right Georgie, maybe I  should  quite.’ But when he opened his mouth all that came out was a raspy meow. He frowned. And tried again. His frown became panic. 

“Georgie.” He said, the panic colouring his voice. I- I don’t think I  can. ”

“What do you mean Jon?” She asked, her own brows furrowing. 

“I- I wanted to-“ he hesitated. 

“...agree with me?” She tried and he nodded frantically. 

“But I can’t. I can’t even  say  it. I can’t quit!” 

“Right. Right ok, don’t panic.” She said trying to keep him calm, she looked around for the admiral- but the fluffy monster was waay ahead of her and was already on his way to Jon. “Do you think the others in the Archives can quit?”

“Oh god.” Jon said, his tail was lashing back and forth as much as it could on her couch, and in the back of her mind she made a note to remember to take a lint roller to it- the admiral was fluffy but he had nothing on Jon. 

“I- I was the one who got them assigned to the Archives. I- I asked for Tim and Sasha’s transfer.”

“Ok, but is it just the archives that can’t quit do you think?” Georgie asked. 

“Yes.” Jon said without hesitation, and then froze. “I- I think. No, no I- I’m sure I know that. How do I know that Georgie? I don’t-“

“Jon!” She said trying to get through to him, but it was clear it wasn’t working and she could see his claws digging into the leather of her sofa. She moved to sit beside him, telegraphing her movements so as not to startle him. She very slowly reached out, giving him plenty of time to tell her to go away, and scratched gently behind his ears. He tensed further for a moment, his tail freezing from its lashing. Before he slowly melted into the contact. “There you go Jon. Just relax.” 

He opened his mouth to say something, but all that came out was a contented mew, and a loud purr. He blinked slowly for a moment , before shaking her hand off his head and batting at it barely avoiding scratching her. 

“I can’t think when you do that.” He mumbled. He shook his head again stretching and lightly kneading the couch cushion beside him. 

“Ok.” She said taking her hand back. “Ok.”

“Thank you though.” Jon said quietly, and Georgie nodded, moving back to her arm chair and giving Jon his space. The Admiral took up a spot on Jon’s lap and he kneaded absentmindedly at his thigh. Jon purred softly, and Georgie was hit with the deep and painful realization that she had never really gotten the chance to know Jon, the real Jon. They had dated for how long and he had never shared this with her. Oh she knew all about his secret soft side, and favourite foods, the way he would occasionally become absorbed in a project to the point of forgetting to eat/ but she couldn’t help but feel like she had been missing out. She resolved that she would just have to get to know him again. The new information contextualized a lot of things and she may have failed to earn his trust as his girlfriend, but maybe she could have it as his friend. 

“You should try talking to your coworkers.” She said finally. “I mean- if they already know about the cat situation, they’ll probably believe you, and if it involves them, they should probably know. But if you can’t quit,” she took a deep breath. “I- look Jon, I’m not thrilled that you were just going to turn into a cat and vanish, I hate the idea of you disappearing and never knowing what happened to you. But, but it sounds like it’s been really awful for you being stuck, and- I can’t make any promises but I can reach out to some of my contacts and see if they know of anything that might help you turn all the way back.” 

“I- you would do that?” His ears perked up and Georgie fought the urge to coo- one does not coo over ex-boyfriends. Even ones that have adorable cat ears. 

“Yeah of course I would Jon, you make it sound like being human has been miserable for you and- and your my friend. I just want you to be happy.”

“Oh.” He squeezed his eyes shut for a long moment. “Thank you.” He said quietly. “But I- I think I need to make sure my coworkers are safe first. I- the institute has always felt off, but this is- I don’t want to abandon them. Not after they refused to abandon me.” 

The conversation drifted to less serious things after that, mostly because Georgie was well aware that Jon was allergic to emotions and was concerned that he would shutdown completely if she pushed it much further. 

She was disappointed to learn that Jon was entirely unable to drink the wine he had brought, but as a seasoned cat owner she had a solution. 

“Jon when you were- physically a cat, did your, look I feel weird saying owner that that seems creepy what did you think of her as?”

“Oh.” Jon said surprised. “Um, my mom I suppose. I mean, she bottle fed me, and such.”

“Right, well did your mom ever give you catnip?” The blush high on Jon’s cheeks and the twitch of his left ear told her more than enough. “Ok, so since you can’t have wine- do you want some catnip tea? I think I may have a bottle of cat wine somewhere too for the admiral, but it’s salmon flavoured so-“ she watched Jon’s pupils expand. “So I’ll grab that and we can get started- I think wine and manicure time.” Jon’s slow blink in response was all she needed and she scratched gently behind his ears on her way to the kitchen. 

The night ended up being a lot of fun, and Jon felt more comfortable then he had in a long time. The catnip made him feel full of energy and very sleepy at the same time, and he ended up staying far later then he had intended. Still he couldn’t get the thought out of his mind. What was wrong with the Magnus Institute?

**Author's Note:**

> Content warnings
> 
> Discussion of what could be viewed as suicidal ideation
> 
> Discussion of past child abuse
> 
> One implied mention of child predators
> 
> Slight body horror


End file.
